Love in the Time of the Flu

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I am a mother.  My life is dedicated to living in love for my little ones.  Sometimes that love is less of a feeling and more of an action.  And sometimes it is not what I do but what I accept and allow to happen to me, sacrificially accepting burdens in love without complaint.

Or maybe with some of the loudest and most vocal protestations ever registered on the Richter scale of motherhood woes.  See, I’m still working on that last part.

Love is having the flu but not actually being able to acknowledge you have the flu.  Because moms don’t get sick.  Or can’t.

Love is burning your arm on the side of the roasting pan in a Nyquil-induced haze and not even realizing you did it until two days later when you finally discover the source of the mysterious pain you’ve been experiencing.  Because your 6 month old has the flu and that has dominated all of your consciousness.

Love is realizing that everyone capable of eating solid food in the house devoured the treats your co-worker gave you for Christmas—EXCEPT YOU—and not even really caring because, hey, it’s not like you need the extra calories.  And really, you’d exchange chocolate for sleep at this point, right?

Love is reading that book even though your throat burns and you think you are about to hack up a lung and wait you have to also sing while reading and do the voices, too!  Because you’ve given her less attention than usual and you know her little heart feels it.

Love is letting go of the slip up or poorly worded remark made by the man who works 60 hour weeks to provide for your family.  Because you know that, like you, he’s so exhausted he probably didn’t even think it through.

Love is a snuggle with your girl, praying you are no longer contagious, and hearing her say, “I love you so much, Mommy.  You are so special to me.”

Love is holding that sobbing baby even when you would give anything to set him down for a shower.  Because when he looks up at you and smiles, you see your face reflected in the light of his eyes, and you know that just for now, for these precious few months of these short first years, you are his whole world.  And you would give anything for his whole world to be full of love.  Only love.

 

 

 

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